Right, I loved the original Fable, great game. Played Fable II and thought it was accomplished but far too easy. Nevertheless, I had a load of credit at CEX, so a few days ago I decided to spunk some of it on Fable III.
Now is it just me, or is Fable III genuine dog gooseberry fool, and got good reviews purely because it's trading on the series' past achievements?
It's so banal. Why would I want to interact with villagers and build relationships if all that means is pressing the shitting A button and watching the same stupid animation OVER AND OVER AGAIN. What the strawberry float?
And the combat seems even easier than Fable II. It's bullshit. I can get through every single battle by rolling backwards and forwards like a strawberry floating feral child while spamming the fireball button. It's just pointless, there's no challenge, it doesn't even feel like a videogame, it's just interactive whimsy. I don't want whimsy, I want a goddamn game, goddamn it.
Also, is it just me or are the graphics bollocks too? I mean the animations look clunky, the characer models are alright, but when you look at Red Dead, and the consider that Fable III has about half that game's draw distance, the world textures are pretty dismal. Not what you'd expect from a triple A title, out of a triple A studio, headed by a strawberry floating knight of the British Empire. Bullshit, I hate it.
Finally, I went online with Fable III, and seeing as I don't have any friends on XBL I just let some random guy join my game. I swear it was as if the essence - the very muse - of Fable III had been implanted into a human being. Now whenever I go on XBL this stupid man keeps inviting me back to Albion and keeps sending me strawberry floating voice messages asking how can he join whatever game it is I'm playing - JUST strawberry floating BUY IT YOU MORON, like you bought Fable III. I get the feeling that this guy is pretty much representative of the Fable III fanbase - happy, but a strawberry floating retard.
Any thoughts? Personally, I think it's total dogshit and I'm taking it back to CEX tomorrow.
I have never played any of the Fable games, but enjoyed your opening post very much. Well written with some neat concepts like INteractive Whimsy summarised in an accessible fashion.
I rate your post as better than Fable III. Probably.